


Darcy Lewis' Series of Not Great Days

by DriannaHarper



Series: One Day Will Be An Excellent Day.  Till Then... [2]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Captain America (Movies), Deadpool - All Media Types, Fantastic Four (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: BAMF Darcy Lewis, Darcy Lewis is Tony Stark's Daughter, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-29
Updated: 2018-08-22
Packaged: 2018-08-27 18:40:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 18,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8412277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DriannaHarper/pseuds/DriannaHarper
Summary: The story of how a teenage Darcy Lewis goes from puberty to the leader of a bad ass team that's taking out the worst bad guys in history.  And how each of the Avengers finds out she's Tony Stark's daughter in the process.Also, I'm writing between the scenes of all the movies, so if you haven't seen them all, some of this might be confusing.





	1. Darcy's Parents Disapprove of Her Life Choices

**Author's Note:**

> This story was supposed to be a simple transition piece. It did NOT end up that way. I am going to post as I go along, but it might not be that often after the initial chapters. Not only is my muse temperamental, but the 'i' and 'e' on my computer started sticking, so... writing is either five chapters a night, or none for a week. Sorry.

When Darcy Elizabeth Stark-Lewis was fourteen years old, she got hit with the puberty stick. Hard. It didn’t work out well for her.

The boys at school were mean, and liked snapping her suddenly necessary bra straps. The girls treated her like she should be ashamed of her unexpectedly curvier body. Her mom and dad tried to explain that all kids her age were kind of horrible, that they were all confused and didn’t know what to do with themselves, and took it out on each other.

Her every other weekend dad took another approach.

“Guys are usually stupid, kid. It’s part of the programming. Probably half of why I can’t get my shit together,” he said, while she snotted into his shirt. 

“What you have to know, and believe, is that you are going to be SO much better than them. You are awesome, and that doesn’t come from being a girl, or a woman, or a Stark, or whatever. That comes from you being you. So, fuck them. Don’t let them get to you, you are going to grow up and forget them. “

She mumbles into his shirt about a guy his age catcalling her in the street.

“Okay, yeah, I’m getting you a taser.”

She also gets self-defense lessons, and refuses to apologize the first time she breaks one of the ass hats fingers in the school hallway when he tries to cop a feel. She gets suspended for three days, and there is a mandatory assembly about sexual harassment. Her mom and dad ground her for a couple of weeks.

Her weekend Dad builds her a better taser. And a robot.

 

Darcy is nineteen when her weekend Dad goes missing. She sees it on the news, recognizes that her usual Thursday night calls aren’t coming, and ignores her parent’s requests that she not get involved. 

She spends a week getting ahead on her school work, tells her professors that she has a family emergency, and calls a number that she was given as a last resort.

“Platypus? My name is Darcy Lewis. I need to come in.”

“… How did you get this number?”

“Tony gave it to me. And I need to help you find him. Jarvis can vouch for me. But please don’t tell anyone else. I don’t know who we can trust.” The last word is broken in two with a stifled sob.

There’s silence on the line for a minute.

“I’m in the Middle East.”

“And I’m in California. I think we can find someplace in between to meet. Please, Rhodey?”

 

James Rhodes doesn’t know who he’s going to meet in a small diner in Virginia, but he agrees to come alone. He isn’t expecting a teenager with red rimmed eyes that is carefully shredding a napkin. 

She stands as he walks up to the booth she’s sitting at. “Colonel Rhodes? Darcy Lewis.”

Her hand is trembling as she extends it out to him. He shakes it, and waits until she sits back down before taking a seat in front of her.

“You have my attention, Miss Lewis. What makes you think-“he starts, while she fumbles in her purse.

“I have a degree in engineering, and I’m working on one in poli-sci. But there’s something I know better than either.”

“And what is that?” he asks, as she pulls a crumpled piece of paper out of her bag. She holds it close to her chest, and looks up at him with watery eyes.

“Jarvis. I know Jarvis better than anyone. Even better than-, “she cuts off, blinking back tears. “I can help with the search programming. I have higher clearance than almost anyone, and I… I…”

She hands over the paper she has clutched in her hand. It’s Stark’s handwriting, and it has two sentences written on it.

_“Rhodey-bear, that’s my kid you’re looking at. Give her whatever she needs.”_

Her tears finally spill over as he gapes at her.

“Let me help find my dad.”


	2. Rhodey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhodey watches another Stark in action.

James Rhodes has always been a little in awe of Tony Stark. It’s tempered by how many times he’s had to chase him down, whether it’s because of a bender, or a cute chick, or trying to avoid a meeting. But there’s something about Tony that makes him want to see the outcome, see how he gets out of the situation he’s gotten himself into.

Watching Tony’s daughter route Jarvis’ systems, while also trying to act like she’s an intern towards everyone else, is a little heartbreaking. He convinced Pepper that she’d be an asset to the company in the future because of her advancing degree in political science, and the slight push was all Darcy needed to secure an internship in HR. 

No one else seems to see how desperate she is. How many hours she puts in, how she always keeps the coffee pot filled when she starts to nod off. He isn’t there often, he’s out searching for Tony, but when he is, he can’t help but wonder how no one sees what she’s doing, how good she is at it.

And then someone else does. Obadiah Stane is watching her, and Rhodey doesn’t like it. There’s no way someone leaked who she is, Stane can’t know. But the careful looks she’s getting upset him.

It’s early in the morning, five months in, when he gets a set of coordinates. And a simple message.

“Bring him home.”

Pepper is waiting for them on the tarmac, and Stane later at the press conference. There is no sign of Darcy, which surprises him. He thought she’d be first in line for a hug.

Instead, he’s called into a conference about how Stark Industries refusing to make weapons would affect his tour. Not long after, he has to fail a mission targeting a rogue missile. 

“Rhodey, it’s ME!”

After all of it, after Stane, and Ten Rings, and not getting a suit, he heads to a diner in Virginia. There isn’t a crying teenager there, but there is a burger with two bites taken out of it, a pile of shredded napkins, and a bus boy that jerks his head towards the back door.

“They started yelling ten minutes in. Go for it, if you want to. The rest of us are staying in here where it’s quiet.”

Rhodey walks through the kitchen, while trying to decide if he should interfere or not. It’s his best friend, he should help…  
He opens the door an inch.

“-Not your god damned decision-“

“Are you fucking kidding me? What other-“

“You put yourself at risk-“

“At RISK? You were kidnapped, asshole! I had to-“

“Do you even KNOW what he would have done?”

Peering out, he looks at the two Starks facing each other down. Darcy punches Tony in the shoulder, but keeps her hand tucked into his sleeve. 

“Yeah! I know! And I know it was worth risking it to get you back. It was worth me, and Pepper, and anyone else, you fucker. You don’t get to do that to me.”

She burrows into his chest, and Tony wraps his arms around her. “You don’t get to yell at me for that. You taught me Jarvis before anything else, and you taught me to take care of myself. 

“But I will not apologize for trying to save people that are being hurt. That’s part of the legacy, that’s what you always said, in case you didn’t remember. Isn’t that what Starks do? We help people stand up against bully’s. And Stane was a giant god damned bully.”

Tony rests his head on hers. “Obie would have killed you, kiddo. He would have wanted you to be the face of the company, and you would have refused every step. You would have been stronger than I’ve ever been, and he would have hurt you. You have any idea what that would have done to me?”

“Cause having Iron Man as a dad is so easy?” she snorts into his shirt.

Tony is quiet for a minute. “Do you want me to quit? I’ll do it, if you want. I’ll destroy the suit right now, if it makes you happy.”

Her head shakes on his shoulder. “You needed something, Dad, you needed something to fight for, and you found it. You found something that makes you want to help out. And I hate the way it happened.” She rests her hand on the arc reactor.

“But I wouldn’t ask you to stop. You have a way to help people, and I can’t ask you to stop helping. But please, don’t ask me to do it either. Even if helping people is helping you. I’d do it, every single time.”

“I don’t like putting you at risk, kid,” Tony says into her hair.

“Tough. I’m a Stark, and I’m made of the same stubborn you are,” she mumbles into his shirt.

He sighs. “You know, I’ve always had something to fight for. The best thing.”

Darcy butts her head into his chest. “Don’t start talking about feels, Dad. We’ll both just get weird about it. And I know, anyway. And I think it’s time Uncle Rhodey stops pretending we don’t know he’s there.”

They look over at Rhodey, and he steps out of the doorway. He’s not sure how to approach them, but Darcy’s fist in his shirt turns it into a group hug.   
“We’re family, and we’re in this together, right?” She asks.

The two men exchange looks, and neither knows exactly what to say. Darcy shoulder bumps both, and repeats, “Riiii-ght?”

“Yeah.”

“Family.”

“Great. Who gets to explain me to Pepper?”

Darcy gets another upgrade to her taser, one that is made into a pair of bracelets. She also gets a permanent connection to Jarvis installed in an implant just behind her ear. She then gets a lengthy conversation from all three parents about how political science is not a great degree, given her talents. She sighs, and goes to speak to her advisor about her ‘missing’ science credits.


	3. Pepper

Virginia Potts doesn’t know how there’s a blank spot on her agenda that is marked for a meeting. She goes to the assigned conference room, and is surprised to find just herself, and a former HR intern. Closing the door, she addresses the young lady.

“Miss Lewis?”

“Miss Potts! Please come in. There’s coffee, if you want it.”

Lewis points to the pot, and remains sitting at her place at the table, running her hands over several simulations.

“May I ask what this meeting is about?”

Lewis sits back. “Yeah… there’s also a bar, right behind the mirror. That’s actually true in most of the conference rooms, come to think…”

She trails off for a minute. Pepper does not make use of the bar, but she does not ignore it all together.

“I take it you might think I’ll need a drink after this conversation?” she asks, with one eye brow raised.

“Well, I needed one after someone tried to kill me, and since that someone was the same one that tried to kill you, I thought I’d let you have the option.”

“I don’t… are you threatening-,” she starts.

“I’m Tony Stark’s daughter. Obadiah Stane tried to kill us both. So…”

Pepper stares at her for a minute. “Are you even legal yet?”

“Well, not quite, but I’m working on a second degree, and I’m a Stark. A glass of wine is totally in order.”

She gets up, walks over to where Pepper is, and hits a button on the mirror. Sure enough, a fully supplied bar is exposed. Selecting a decent bottle of wine, she expertly opens it, and pours two glasses.

“So… which parts of that reveal do you want to unpack first?” she asks, as she hands Pepper a glass.

“You’re Tony’s daughter.”

“Yeah.”

“You… you were the one that helped find him, weren’t you?”

Pepper takes a sip off her glass, and squares up to the young woman. “You were pretending, the entire time, that you were just an intern.”

“Well, no, I WAS an intern, it just wasn’t what-,” she manages, before is taken by the shoulders and shaken a bit.

“Do you know how dangerous that was? Do you KNOW what Stane could have done?”

Darcy starts to laugh, a bit. 

“No really, Lewis. He tried to kill me! If he knew who you were-“

“He didn’t. No one does. Just my parents, Rhodey, and now you. You get that, right? It was my choice to make, and yeah, I knew. What was I supposed to do, it was my DAD.”

After another moment of taking her in, Pepper crushes her in a hug. “I’m going to kill him. Him and Rhodey, I swear.”

Darcy snickers into her shoulder. “For what? I’m a grown woman, and I make my own choices. Sometimes, that involves hacking the Army, it’s cool.”

“Sometimes your father blows up terrorist organizations.”

“Yeah, I’m not great with that. If you could work on getting him to stop that part, that would help.”

Pepper holds her for another minute. “How outside of legal age for booze are you?”

“About three weeks. I’m also taking an internship in New Mexico next week, so I expect margaritas. Dad’s not happy about me being so far away, so I’m also expecting him to get even crazier than he has been recently. Did you notice that?”

Darcy’s taser bracelets are upgraded again. She isn’t exactly sure what her Dad did, but they’re smaller, and more powerful. Her Jarvis is also given a separate server, so she can activate him at any time. She loves and hates it at the same time. It feels like he’s preparing her to be alone.

It feels like her Dad is saying goodbye.


	4. Agent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you haven't seen the Marvel One Shot "A Funny Thing Happened On the Way to Thor's Hammer", you should. Also, some of this might be confusing without it.

Phil Coulson does not like being assigned to Stark. The man is loud, and crude, and amazing all at the same time. And he is hiding something. Phil doesn’t know what he’s hiding, but that’s Natasha’s job to figure out.

Except she doesn’t.

Romanoff manages to get close to Stark, to Potts, to Rhodes, and to Hogan, but she doesn’t find out what Phil needs to know.

Oh, he knows about the palladium poisoning. SHEILD knew about that months ago. There’s something else, though, something he can’t quite figure out.

He’s reassigned suddenly, and he doesn’t like it, but he is, at the heart of it, a company man. He goes to let Stark know. 

“Land of enchantment.”

“So I hear.”

“So… what’s so special about New Mexico? You know I’m dying, I won’t tell.”

There’s a noise behind one of the cabinets, and Coulson darts his eyes over. 

“Oh yeah, she won’t tell either.”

Mumbled swearing comes from the cabinet.

“Wait- was that Mandarin? When did you learn-” Stark starts.

“Actually, I think it was Cantonese. It was also not flattering,” Coulson says. “Miss-“

“It’s my fucking internship he’s going after,” Darcy says, pulling herself up from the floor. “There’s a thing in New Mexico, the one you’re trying to get info on, and his Alphabet group is going after it.”

“Is that why you could only come in yesterday?”

“You only told me yesterday that you were dying, ass hole. I’d have been here before then if you’d-“

“Your education is important-“

“Not more than your LIFE, you-“

“And I’m not going to-“

“Oh, my, GOD, are we having this argument again? ‘Cause-“

“Agent over there has to go to do a super-secret spy thing. Are you part of that?”

Coulson keeps quiet as the two stand off.

“We may have hit a guy with our truck.”

“Darcy!”

“The guy got up and acted all crazy, yelling about a hammer! I may or may not sort have… tased him.”

Stark pinches the skin between his eyes.

“He walked it off.”

The brunette grabs Starks arm as he drops it in disbelief.

“He was fine. It was the regular taser. He got crazy-pants again in the ER, and they nailed him with a tranq. They’re keeping him in observation. There’s… Agent is right that something is weird. But I’m not going back there. Jane can do this without me. You need me right now. I’m not leaving you.”

Stark grabs the girl in a hug. “You’ve done all you can here. Either it works, or it doesn’t.”

“And if it doesn’t, I’m not leaving you.”

“Baby, there are bigger things happening. If I can’t be there, you’ll have to.”

She stares up at him, wide eyed. “You yelled at me. You told me you didn’t want me getting in danger.”

“I did. And I don’t want you there. If I could keep you safe at home all the time, I would. But you were right when you said it was our legacy. We have to do this. Whatever is there, whatever you’re about to see, if it’s too much, you run away. But if you can help, you help.

“I love you. I may not always have been the best Dad, but I love you to bits. So you go with Agent. And you fix what needs fixing.”

He hugs her for another moment before pushing her away to kiss her on the head. “You have always been the best of me. And the best of the Starks. So do what needs doing.”

He turns them to face Phil, hugging her to his chest. “Agent. This is my daughter Darcy. I’m expecting you to keep that quiet. She’s going back to her ‘crazy scientist Jane’ with you, and she’s going to help you figure out whatever it is that SHEILD is involved with. I’m trusting you to keep her safe.”

His gaze pins Phil. “I’m trusting you here. You keep her safe, and you keep her unknown. If things go south for me, she stays under the radar. Agreed?”

“Dad-“

“Mister Stark, things in New Mexico might not be safe. I won’t lie about that. We don’t know what’s going on, and it could be very dangerous. But I promise to look out for Darcy. I can’t promise to keep her out of getting herself into trouble-, “Coulson says.

“Yeah. No one can.”

“But as far as need to know goes, I don’t think SHEILD needs to know about her parentage. Darcy Lewis is Doctor Foster’s intern. I think she may have gone into a larger city yesterday for supplies. She’ll be back in Puente Antigua in the morning.”

“Thank you, Agent.”

Darcy doesn’t get an upgrade on weapons, but she does get a packet of powdered doughnuts to give to Jane. Coulson’s smirk at exiting the gas station doesn’t last long. There are three men on the ground near a running car.

“What? Seriously? Dudes threatened me holding metal weapons! Come on!”

“Do all Starks come armed?”

“… kind of?” Darcy hesitates.

“Do I even want to know?”

She shrugs, and then stretches her fingers. Electricity sparks between them. “Dunno, even I don’t know how it works. It just does. My dad IS a genius. So your guys better be good at helping him out, and if our tech doesn’t work…”

“We’re doing our best, Miss Lewis. I promise.”

They stare each other down for a minute, before Darcy shrugs.

“…That thing with the flour kicked ass, though. You single?”

“I’m older than your father.”

“Meh. I like older guys. They know how to be respectful. Plus, WAY better in bed.”

It’s a long drive through the night. But the company could have been worse.


	5. Thor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor sees more than he lets on. And Darcy is pretty sure he won't tattle when he figures it out.

Darcy is dropped off at the lab first thing in the morning. She smirks as Agent drives away.

“You’ve got chocolate on your tie!” she yells. 

Everything in the lab is the same. No one even noticed she was gone. Then, she commented on the anomaly in Janes pictures.

So, Jane hitting the guy the second time was NOT her fault. And she kept her mouth shut when Agent showed up with his jack booted thugs to steal their equipment. She only KIND of hacked SHEILD to get Thor a legal looking ID. And yeah, she knew Agent knew. Come on, the guy was a pro. So, she kept that quiet.

But Thor wasn’t stupid. They’re in lawn chairs around the fire, and okay, Eric is passed out in the RV, but Darcy is NOT sleeping next to that mess. She’s also not going to sleep too close to the Medieval Fairy Tale going on over there, so she positions her chair as close to the fire as she can, while staying away from Jane maybe banging the crazy guy. Slowly, she hears Jane’s mile a minute speech slow to a stop.

It’s peaceful in the desert. In a way that it can never be in Malibu, or New York, or even Oregon. There’s a quiet that happens when it’s just a person and the stars.

Thor’s voice is more of a rumble, but it’s as quiet as he can manage. “You are troubled, Lady Darcy.”

She sighs. “Aren’t we all, big guy?”

“It is more than that. You have a weight that you do not share. You need not share it with me, if you do not wish, but it seems heavy.”

Darcy stares at the stars for another minute.

“Is your family well?”

“Is yours?”

“No, indeed. I only just learned that my father has passed. I am no longer welcome in Asgard, and so I hope to make Midgard my new home. And perhaps, find a new family. I would readily call you my shield sister, as you were not only able to fell me in battle, but also welcomed me in your world.”

She’s silent for another minute. “My dad’s sick.”

“My lady-“

“And I don’t know if he’s going to be okay. But when I told him what was going on here, he told me this was more important. That I had to be strong enough to help. So I’m here.”

“There is no battle here.” Thor says softly.

“Do you not see what’s going on? You are here. SHEILD is here. There’s a giant base built around Mew-mew. Something’s going to happen. And if it does, Dad’s going to want someone there. Even if he doesn’t really want me to be here, he can’t be. It’s got to be one of us.”

“You see the responsibility as yours?”

“Yeah. Yes. If there’s the smallest thing I can do, I gotta do it.”

“Then you prove what I sought to learn. Those that are mighty may fight for nothing. Those that are seen as tiny, they are worth all.”

With that, Thor pulls up his blankets, and goes to sleep. Darcy stays awake, star gazing


	6. Barton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So... that was fun?

Clint Barton has seen a lot of crazy shit. Some of it in the last few hours. So when Coulson orders him to pick up a twenty something chick in a beanie that was just in the line of fire, evacuating a pet shop from a giant flame spewing robot? He just tosses off a half assed salute and hunts the woman down.

She’s on the roof of the car dealership with the Doctors, a bottle of tequila, and an old school boom box. Doctor Foster is gesturing at the sky dramatically, while Doctor Selvig just looks tired.

“Yo! Taser chick! Get down here, need you for a thing!” Clint yells up at them.

She leans over the rooftop to look at him. “Yeah? Says who?”

“I’m quoting here- ‘Agent I Pod Thief says there are things going down that need your brand of justice.’ And that really is a quote, I’d never say-“he gets out before realizing that she’d already scurried to the ladder and was making her way down to him. Foster and Selvig just gape at them.

“Sorry Jane!” she yells back, once she clears the bottom. “I gotta do a thing. Be back soon!” 

“What kind of thing?” Foster hollers.

“We can talk about the thing later!” she shouts back over her shoulder. “Where’s your ride, Jack Booted Thug Number Three?”

“Name’s Clint.”

“Don’t care that much at the moment, but if you get me where Son of Coul wants me to be post fucking haste? I’ll be your new BFF. We can braid each other’s hair later.”

He leads her around a few buildings to where a quinjet is hidden. The girl’s eyes widen a bit, and she breaks out in a grin. “Sweet. Are you driving, or am I?”

“You don’t even know where we’re going,” he says.

“No, but I have a few guesses. You gonna clue me in?”

“Just get in the jet.”

Clint has to physically move her out of the pilot’s seat and then waits until she buckles herself in next to him, pouting.

“So, you going to tell me what needs my awesomeness? I don’t usually get abducted by guys I don’t know. Or, well, I kind of do in the last few days, but that’s a new thing.”

The quinjet takes straight off, heading on course before she’s even finished speaking.

“Holy Amazeballs, Batman. What kind of engine do you have in this? Because I didn’t think-“she starts.

“Coulson wants you in New York. Something’s going down at the Stark Expo. He thinks you… Hey, kid, you okay?” he asks her, watching her go grey.

“You know what, dude? I’m really fucking not,” she says, poking at her ear. “Jay, dial it in. What the fuck is going on?”

He watches her face scrunch up in confusion. “What do you mean you can’t get into the system? No one can lock me out except… no. Jay, tell me he’s not… he’s okay, right? He’d have called if-“

Her face clears, the devastated look she was wearing replaced by one of fury. “Thug number three?”

“Still Clint.”

“Can you fly faster?”

“Well, yes-, but the jet doesn’t go faster. So-“

“You want to fly it, or do you want to shoot things?”

“I’m confused.”

The girl cracks her fingers, and they spark. “My name is Darcy. I’m about to help take out Justin Hammer in your plane, with or without you. It’d be more fun with you. What do ya think?"

Clint looks at her for a few seconds. “How much faster?”

She grins, and jams her hands into the console. “J-man? Need an upgrade.”

By the time they make it to New York, its night, and they almost take a shot to the side of their jet from War Machine.

“Jarvis, why the FUCK is Uncle Rhodey shooting at us?”

“Nat, we’re in the line of fire, report?”

Clint navigates around the drones, and Darcy refuses to fire on them. “They’re shooting at us! Shoot fucking back!”

“One of those is my Uncle, and he can’t control the suit! I’m not killing my Uncle by accident!”

“Then you’re risking him shooting us down!”

“Stop fucking yelling at me, I’m working on it. So is SHEILD, and so’s my Dad. And your damned partner, she’s gotta be SO pissed right now.”

Another voice comes on line. “Who is this?”

“The person trying to not get shot at by Colonel Rhodes at the moment. Are you Nat?” Darcy asks, as they spiral out of the way of another set of drones.

“Yeah-"

“It’s Hammer. He’s-"

“We have Hammer. And we’re working on controlling-"

“No, you have to evac everyone. The drones, they’re going after the civilians in the Expo. Get everyone out!” 

A quick toggle in her ear, and Darcy hits a button. “Get them out, we have to get clear.”

“They’re going after you.”

“Yeah, they are NOW.” 

“Clint, what-?” Nat shouts.

“No idea, but she’s right. The drones chasing War Machine and Iron Man are all after us now. Evac everyone else. What are we doing here, kid?”

“Drawing attention away so the idiots in the suits can stop Venko. Then, I’m going to do a thing.”

“Another thing, are you-“

“Clint, buddy…head over the water.”

“What sort of a thing are we doing here?” he asks quietly.

“…Hoping for the best. Jay? We’ll be fine. Do the thing, “she says, as a massive EMP drops them, and the drones, into the bay. The jet shudders, and slams into the bottom of the bank.

“What the-“

“We’ll be fine. The jet is sealed, and I’ve got enough back up to run it. Call your people. Call Coulson, and Nat, and whoever. Find out what happened.”

“What happened? What happened is that you took over control of a god damned op, and why the hell-“ Clint rants, starting to unhook his harness.

Darcy grabs him by the front of his tac vest, and yanks his face across the control panel. “What happened is that I just helped save a bad op going south. Probably also saved your life in the process, so you are fucking welcome. Jay? Feel free to patch in when you want to?”

The com comes live, with several people trying to yell over each other. Then, large explosions occur in various areas around the water above them, with more controlled blasts coming from the drones in the bay with them.

They look at each other. “So...,”Clint starts. “Sealed in, huh?"

“You know how to braid hair?”

“Honey, I used to be in the circus.” 

Three hours later, Iron Man and War Machine drag a quinjet out of the bay. Darcy and Clint glare out at them, playing cards knocked aside. 

“I was winning,” Darcy states, sitting up.

“The hell you were. She’s a fucking cheat. Don’t listen to her.” Clint doesn’t even bother getting up.

“He always cheats, this is not a surprise,” the Widow says, striding into the jet and yanking the girl into a hug.

“Uh, what just,” Darcy starts. 

“You are strong. I will make you stronger, “the Widow mutters.

“Okay, and I’ll make you pancakes? Or… What just happened?”


	7. Natasha

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha does not like having her people in the field with unknowns. This one turns out to be more interesting than she thought.

Natasha Romanov does not trust people. She really doesn’t trust people with her people. So when she hears that an unknown is active with Barton, she is not on board with it. She is WAY not on board with it when Coulson clears it. She is not okay, until she hears the woman’s voice. 

“One of those is my Uncle, and he can’t control the suit! I’m not killing my Uncle by accident!” 

The jet spirals out of the way, and the drones take off after it. She finishes rebooting Rhodey’s suit, and watches as they go down. 

“What just happened?”

“I just got your best friend back.”

Stark swears. “Fuck that, Rushmanoff. Where did that jet that is getting shot down just go? Find that!”

“Tony, I never meant-“ Rhodey starts.

“Help me get this under control, and then we’ll find them. Red, you got something better to do?”

“Go get Venko, I’ll find the plane.”

“Don’t just find the plane, you find them alive and okay. If you don’t, you don’t worry about still having a job at Stark, or at SHEILD, Pepper will END you. Go find them.”

Nat spends the next half hour tracing the coms, including the evasive one used during her brief interlude with the unknown subject. She finally catches a break.

“You are such a fucking liar, Barton, and I don’t even care. I will not give in.”

“It’d be better for you if you did.”

The Widow hears a struggle, and her arms tense.

“Fine. I have no idea how you even managed that, but I call cheat,” Barton whines.

“Don’t cheat at Go Fish, I won’t have to beat you at-“

“You didn’t beat me, I’m regrouping. And I’m a trained Agent, I’m going to win the war. One, two, BAM, lizard poisons Spock. Burn, that has to-“

“Oh, dude. Don’t make me. Don’t make me do it.”

“Aww, Darce, no. I was doing okay there.”

“Anyone picking this up? I happen to be stuck in a quinjet in the ocean right now; next to a guy that SO cheats at cards. Anyone got this? Got an update for me, maybe? Cause I might have to break his thumbs, soon.”

“I thought we were friends.”

“That’s until I found out you bitched about everything.”

“This is Agent Romanoff. I copy.”

“Wait, wait, dude. Is this the chick that Clint has been waiting on that has clearance? ‘Cause this sounds like the chick that’s been Mr Starks personal assistant for since Pepper became CEO. Are you her? Are you a flipping plant?”

Two hours later, the jet is dragged out of the water, and behind the less than happy Iron Man and War Machine, is a slightly bedraggled red head.

Barton and Lewis barely budge from their seats on the floor. 

“He always cheats, it is not a surprise,” the Widow says, striding into the jet and yanking the girl into a hug.

“Uh, what just,” Darcy starts. 

“You are strong. I will make you stronger, “the Widow mutters.

“Okay, and I’ll make you pancakes? Or… What just happened?”

Darcy struggles out of the hug. “Are you… You’re Natalie the spy, aren’t you?”

She shoves her away. “Fuck your spy shit, dude. I have no time for that. Where’s-?”

Stark strides over to the girl, and pulls her up against the armor. “You are not allowed to like either of them. And I get all the pancakes.”

Barton and Romanoff watch in fascination as the girl not only doesn’t struggle, but throws her arms around his neck and smacks a kiss against the helmet.  
“I can make pancakes for whoever I like. I’m also really mad at you right now.”

“Aww, what’d I do, kid?”

She pulls away slightly. “Let’s start with where Agent Agent had to bring me in, and you didn’t give me a god damned phone call when you realized Hammer stole our tech? Wanna start there? ‘Cause-“

“I was kind of busy, you know, with not letting him kill-“

“Nu-uh, you have a straight link IN MY HEAD that could have-“

“I was out HEROING, Darcy. You told me-“

“I was out heroing myself, dumb ass, and-“

“Yeah, I saw that, and I’m not happy right now either. You were-“

“No more than you were.”

The faceplate on the helmet pops up, and the two glare at each other. War Machine slumps against the side of the ramp.

“Jesus. You two want to get a diner?”

“I think that’s an excellent idea,” Coulson says as he strides aboard the jet. “Except, let’s make it a bar. I know one that’s off the record. They have excellent nachos. We can debrief there. No,” he says, as Clint and Nat start to follow the trio. “You have standard debriefing with Sitwell at HQ.”

The Agents glance at each other, and cross their arms over their chests. Both raise an eyebrow at Coulson, and stand their ground.

The three stand off for a solid thirty seconds, before they hear Darcy yell.

“Bring them if you want, Phil, but make them pinky swear to shut the fuck up about it.”

“Phil? Why is he Phil? Darcy? Why is he Phil?”

“It was a long car trip. We bonded.”

Darcy does not get an upgrade on her tasers. She does get a promise of more lessons from the Widow, watches her Dad and Clint shark a pool table, and leans against Rhodey, as he shakes his head at all of them.

“This is going to go bad. This is going to go SO badly.”

“Oh, Rhodey. You have no idea.”


	8. Jane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane Foster isn't great at noticing things. Unless she does. And she proves to be a fantastic friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are two characters that I've never written before, and was uncomfortable with. One was Natasha (and she's one of my favorites!), the other was Jane Foster. This chapter turned into the longest single shot I've written in a couple of years. I guess it was one of those 'go for what you're nervous about' things. Hope you like!

Darcy gets shipped back to New Mexico two days later. 

“It’s safer for you there, little me.”

“Yeah… that’s never going to catch on.”

“Why not?”

“I’m pretty sure Nat has adopted me as her youngling.”

There’s a moment of silence.

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Pretty sure.”

“I’ll build you a suit.”

“I’ve already started upgrading my tasers.”

“But do they have repulsers? …. Darce? They don’t, do they?”

“I’ll send you the schematics later. Now, what’s this about finding a guy in the ice? It’s not THE guy, right? Not the one Howard was all crazy pants about? Oh, sorry, were you and Jarvis and I NOT supposed to be all up in SHEILD’s business?”

 

She gets a Skype three weeks later.

“Miss Lewis-“

“Oh hey, Agent. Wanna explain in smaller words what Jane is losing her shit over?”

“We need you to take Doctor Foster to Tromso. Now.”

“Do you have-,”

“NOW, Miss Lewis. There is a lab that is offering funding for her research. But it needs to be done immediately.”

“There’s going to have to be negotiation for this. We’re making headway here.”

“This isn’t the time-“

“I want full funding for Jane’s research for the next year. Fully covered moving costs for wherever we have to go, and I want to be able to refuse NDA’s for whatever is about to happen. And a quinjet, if I have to get us out. Deal, or no deal?”

“Deal, Lewis, get her on the plane!”

“I want that in writing,” he hears, and then yelling. “JANE, grab your socks, and get in the car. YES, I got your damned spectrometer. Get in the CAR!”

*Sigh* “I got her. Let me know how it goes. Promise me, you let me know.

“I mean that, Agent. You… You fucking let me know that you’re all okay, right? This sounds bad.”

“It isn’t good. But I’ll make sure you know. So will Jarvis.”

“I shall, Agent, but you’ve already asked me to go against protocols.”

“You already broke the protocols? When?”

“When I over rode the elevator. Your Dad wasn’t answering his phone. I didn’t have a choice.”

“It was entirely unnecessary,” Jarvis says, huffily. “Darcy gave you security clearance when she was made aware of the Avengers Initiative.”

“When she was-?”

“That was before New Mexico. Nick and I have an understanding. Let it go, Agent Dude, and let me get my science crazy safe. JA- Oh, you even found SHOES!"

 

Jane Foster is a very smart woman. She’s not so great at social queues, but she tries. Darcy was not the intern she expected, but one that she quickly found to be the intern she needed. She talked a lot, and played whatever she wanted from her IPod in the lab, but she always had what Jane needed, moments before she asked for it. 

After Darcy got back from whatever the still unexplained ‘Thing’ was, Jane tried to pay more attention. Stumbling out of her room at whatever o’clock in the afternoon one day, she saw Darcy hanging half off a machine, screwdriver clenched in her teeth, as she tried to reconnect some wayward wiring.  
Instead of charging forward and yelling as she wanted to do, Jane stood back and watched.

“That’s right, mother fucker, respect the science. Oh, no, you-“Darcy grunted, as she struggled to get the piece she wanted into place. She cheered around her screwdriver, before yanking it out of her mouth and tightening the connection in. 

“Team Science for the win,” Darcy raised her hands up, fingers doing a peace sign as she slid down the machine. “That deserves Pop-Tarts!”

She took three strides towards the kitchen before she sagged. “No, that deserves… But… You are so mean to me, Jay. I don’t need… Fine.”

Darcy moved to her purse. “Just because vegetables might be involved doesn’t mean it’s better than a sugar crash… You don’t even know… No, you’ve never had Pop-Tarts, OR sugar, you don’t even…. Oh, my GOD, stop reciting nutritional things at me. I’m going, okay?”

Jane watched Darcy scribble something on the back of a print out of data, which she shoves onto the top of her closed laptop. She then left the showroom, muttering.

“Bunch of fucking mother hens, don’t even know…”

Moving forward and picking up the note, Jane squinted after her intern in the mid afternoon sun. Darcy is still talking to someone, and gesturing wildly. 

_“Jane- Going for food. My ass of a little brother insists that I get something that is more nutritious than poptarts. But the jerk doesn’t realize I’m getting us waffles. And bacon. ALL of the bacon. Be back soon. –D”_

After that, Jane prides herself on picking up on Darcy’s tells. She shoves her hair behind her right ear a lot when she’s figuring something out. She hesitates sometimes when she moves towards the coffee pot, and more often than not, she snorts and keeps going. 

There are days when she has a line between her brows, and her hands brush over her wrists. Jane could swear that the hair on her arms prickles at those times. She wants to ask, but doesn’t know how.

They hit a snag in the data. It lasts for three days, before they take the usual course of action- buying a bottle of cheap tequila and heading for the roof. It’s three shots in before Jane has the nerve to bring it up.

“I didn’t know you had family.”

Darcy gives her a look. “I totally told you about Mom and Dad. They’re still in Oregon, and do NOT approve of my life choices. Like, Political Science might not be ‘becoming a lawyer’ like they wanted, but-“

“The note the other day. You said you had a little brother,” Jane says quietly.

“Well, fuck sticks,” Darcy mutters. 

They sit in their chairs in silence for a while.

“My brother,” Darcy begins.

“You don’t have to-“

“He’s… One of a kind. Literally. I can’t really go into more detail-“

“I shouldn’t have asked, Darce, but you look out for me, and he looks out for you, and-“

“He’s looking out for all of us. All the time. He’s… the best of us.”

Darcy’s phone rings. She takes one look at it, and winces. “Jay wants to talk to us.”

“Darce-“

“No, it’s best if he makes the decision for himself. I’ll put it on speaker.”

She sets the phone on the table between them. “Hey there, Super dude. What would you like to talk about?”

“I believe that it is time to let Doctor Foster know who I am, because you are wrong in your previous statement,” a British voice says over the phone.

“Which one, Jay, I let the tequila-“

“YOU are the best of us, Darcy. Sir has said it before, and I concur. Doctor Foster?”

“Erm… Jay? Or…?”

“My name is Jarvis, and I consider myself privileged to be included in the-“

“Jay!” Darcy yells.

“-family,” he continues without a beat. “I would, however, ask you to keep this quiet. As Darcy calls it, on the ‘down low’.

Jane stares at Darcy, who is stoically looking at her phone.

“You’re the one that keeps us supplied with breakfast foods?” she asks.

“I am.”

“I mean-“

“I supply the eggs, milk, and Pop-Tarts.”

“Then you’re good in my books. Now scram. We’re drinking.”

Jarvis sighs. “Darcy-“

“Nope, nope, science is at a standstill, we’re doing the tequila. Unless you have a better idea.”

“I’ve been told that yoga is a nice past time.”

“Tell me how it works out for you. And, New Mexico out. Let me know if there’s a thing.”

“Of course.”

The phone shuts off.

“So… That was an AI, wasn’t it? The texture of speech, and the patterns in his vocal range-“

“Yes, my little brother is an AI. Is that going to be a problem?”

“Are you kidding? He was AWESOME!”

Darcy blinks at Jane, mouth opening and closing for a moment. “That’s… not the response I was expecting.”

Jane lunges at Darcy, a yanks her head around. As Darcy yelps, Jane realizes that the tequila may have made her slightly less coordinated than she usually was. Not that she was all that graceful to begin with.

“Sorry. But you have a control, right? I was wondering why you kept talking to yourself,” she says, brushing her hand over the com under the skin behind Darcy’s ear.

“You noticed that? And also, hey! Watch the goods, Foster. You break it, you buy it.”

“I notice things! Sometimes. You also fix things when you think I’m not looking. I’m looking, Darce! Okay, mostly when I’m sleepy, but I see stuff!”

“Yeah, I guess you do, boss lady. But look, you can’t tell anyone about Jay, okay? He’s not ready for public consumption, and I’m not going to push him-“

“Seriously? After what I’ve been through with my research, and then what happened with SHIELD? I will keep him, as he asked, on the ‘down low’. Can I have his number, though? I totally want to run some ideas by him.”

 

After that, Darcy and Jane are thick as thieves. Enough so, that Jane barely looks up when Darcy starts throwing equipment into duffels, and yells at her to grab her socks. It’s not until she steps out onto the pavement that she realizes she hadn’t, and her feet were still bare. She went back inside and grabbed socks, AND shoes.

They’re on a plane for a while before she looks up from her tablet again, and thinks to ask where they’re going.

“Tromso. You got a grant, we’re doing science there.”

“Oh. Did we apply for a grant?”

“No, boss lady, we did not.”

Jane takes a good look at Darcy. She’s tearing a napkin into small pieces, biting her bottom lip, and staring out the window. Looking around the plane, Jane notices that they aren’t exactly flying commercial.

“Why do we have a private jet? And is that a stripper pole?”

“Tromso is a lie, Jane,” Darcy says, looking like she’s about to cry. “We’re going to ground. I don’t know what’s going on, but it’s bad. And we were possibly going to be in the middle of it. We were a distraction, so we’re hiding until it’s over.”

“We’re hiding? From what? What could be so bad that-“

“I don’t know. They just told me-“

“They? Who, they? SHIELD? Are you working for them? Darcy-“

“NO, Jane, I don’t work for SHIELD. For the most part, I think that they can fuck themselves. But there are a couple of people in the company that I trust. And one of the people I trust the most asked me to make sure we’re safe. The observatory we’re going to has some great equipment, and I got some awesome negotiation from SHIELD in agreeing to go.”

She twists another napkin in her hands. “I’m looking out for you, Jane. Whatever is about to go down? It’s gotta be pretty bad for them to ask me for favors. But I’m in your corner, not theirs. Okay?”

Jane scoots closer to Darcy, and grabs one of her hands, prying it away from the mangled napkin. “Okay. Okay, Darce. We’re in this together, right? What does Jarvis say?”

Darcy sniffles. “Not a lot. What he can say is that he’s glad we’re going, and we can keep working. He… Our Dad… We’re not getting a lot of information. We have limited access to the servers, so we can’t-“

“So we work. Right? We keep going, and we do whatever we can until we can go home.”

“Yeah,” Darcy says, wiping her eyes. “We work.”

 

They’re in the lab for a day and a half, and getting pretty awesome results, before Darcy’s face goes white, and she hits the com behind her ear.

“Jay… say that again?”

There’s a pause, and Darcy claps a hand over her mouth and turns away from Jane, doubling over.

Rushing to her friend, Jane wraps a surprisingly strong arm around her and ushers her to a chair.

“Hey. What just happened?”

There’s nothing for a moment, and then Darcy sucks in a breath. “Agent’s down. He’s… God, Jane, whatever is going on, it killed him. Phil’s dead.”  
She starts sobbing then, and Jane has no idea what to do besides sit on the arm of the chair and hug her. 

Long minutes go by, and the tears taper off. “Fuck this,” Darcy murmurs. “Fuck this not knowing thing. I’m done with doing what I’m told. I need to know. Jay-“

Her request is cut off by shouting from the rest of the scientists. They might not speak the same language, but ‘panic’ is universal. The two women join the group around the television in the lounge.

The scene in New York is horrible. There’s a portal in the sky, creatures attacking the city, and in the middle of it-

“Thor!”

“Yeah, saw that, Jane, can we focus on the fact that we were evac’d from THAT? That’s what they got us away from? We would have been targets for those things, and I…I could have helped, I could have-“

“Done what? Talked them out of it? You’re going for politics, not fighting. That’s my boyfriend out there!”

Darcy turns wounded eyes on her. “I have a hell of a lot more to lose, right now, so don’t test me, Foster.

“Jarvis, I don’t care who you have to hack, get me on com. And call Clint, he’ll let me know what’s going on.”

She steps back into the lab, and turns on all the equipment to get what information she can. The largest tablet she can find she divides into sections for each Avenger.

“Not the best time, kid,” comes over the audio.

“No, the best time would have been when you guys were telling me what the hell was going on.”

“Sorry, I was kind of busy being brain fucked by Loki. Now we have a thing.”

“I can see the thing. It’s all over the news.”

“Yeah, he isn’t exactly being subtle.”

“Keep me in the loop, okay? I’ll shut up, you all gotta focus, but let me know? I should be there.”

“Better that you aren’t. You know who would be distracted.”

“Clint.”

There’s a sigh. “Yeah, yeah. We’re still 31 out of 40.”

“Like hell. Stop losing, Barton. Jay, mute on my end.”

Jane steps in tentatively behind her. “Darcy?”

“I can’t… I can’t argue with you right now. That’s my family out there and I… Jarvis? What have you got?”

“The Hulk has subdued Loki. The rest of the team is fighting the incoming army. Sir is doing the best he can to contain them .”

“Where the fuck is SHIELD?”

One of the screens switches to Fury arguing with the WSC about sending a nuke into the city. Jane wraps her arms around Darcy, hugging her from behind. They both watch as Fury tries to stop the weapon from being deployed.

“No. Oh, no,” Darcy whispers. “Don’t you dare. Don’t you fucking- Jay, call him.”

The phone rings and rings. It’s finally answered just as they watch Iron Man grab the nuke and aim it at the portal.

“Not great timing, honey.”

“When’s going to be a better time? When you’re fucking dead? Don’t do this.”

“Kind of have to.”

“No, you don’t. Aim it at the precipice and let it go.”

“I have to see this through. Legacy.”

“Don’t fucking pull that on me, you don’t get to die here.”

“It’s this, or the rest of the city is at risk. I have to, Darce. I love you.”

“Don’t you dare-“she yells, as she watches him go through the portal.

“NO! Dad? Dad, if you can hear me, I love you. Please. Please do what you can to come back. I can’t do this without you. Okay? I need you to come back. Please, Dad. Come on, I’ll do really irrational science without you if you don’t. Come ON.”

Jane hugs her tighter as they hear the command. “Close it.”

They both watch as the portal closes. At the last minute, Iron Man falls through, and they can hear cheering from the next room. But he’s falling, not flying, and it isn’t until the Hulk catches him that Darcy can breathe again. 

“Jarvis?”

“Darcy?”

“Is Dad awake?”

“He is, all systems functioning at normal.”

“Okay. Let him know that I am super pissed off at him.”

“He says that he loves you too. Also, have you had shawarma?”

“We had it two years ago when we were in Egypt.”

“Sir does not recall.”

“Yeah, I bet sir does not recall a lot about that trip. Can we get the jet prepped for New York? I think there are a lot of things I need to talk to him about in person.”

“Indeed. You may wish to avoid the common area. There is an Asgardian shaped hole in the floor.”

“Or I might shellac it. It’d be a great conversation piece.”

“It would. Darcy?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m very sorry about Agent Coulson. I know you were close.”

“… Thanks, Jay. He died in service to his country. And fighting in arms with Captain America. He would have been proud, if he could, and we can be proud for him.”

“Quite right. We’ll see you when you arrive.”

The arms around her turn her into Jane’s shoulder. “So… Iron Man is your dad.”

“Yep.”

“Darce,” Jane sighs. “Your dad being in danger TOTALLY outweighs my boyfriend. You should have said. And Agent?”

“Agent I Pod Thief. He knew about me and Tony, and didn’t say anything. And he’s, he’s…”

Jane cuddles her closer, and makes a phone call. “Yeah, Jay, let me know when the jet is ready. Darcy needs to hug her dad. And maybe Hawkeye. Possibly the Hulk, I don’t care, just make it happen.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My favorite Jane will always be the 'I'm doing Science so hard I ran face first into a poptart' Jane.


	9. Bruce

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do all Stark employees get treated like this?

Bruce Banner is still not sure that taking Stark’s offer of playing in R&D Candyland was a good idea. He’s shaky, being around people that know who he is. He spends two days alone in his newly set up lab, and then ventures down to Tony’s workshop. 

The loud music he expected. The woman throwing herself at him he did not. Expect. At all.

“You are SO my favorite Avenger. Warning, though, that might change. It depends on if Hawkeye comes through with his promise of breakfast. Bacon versus you saving Iron Man?”

She leans back long enough to shrug. “Bacon will probably win. I’m easy like that.”

Bruce’s arms are still at his sides, trying not to touch the brunette. “Um… I-“

“DUDE,” she says, wrapping her arms around him again. “You saved the day, and you saved that idiot from crashing from A FUCKING WORMHOLE!” She yells over her shoulder.

“You’d have done the same thing, kidlet.” Tony hollers from the back of the workshop.

“I’d have been smarter about it, dumb ass!”

“I’m… not sure what’s going on here. But you probably shouldn’t… do you know-“Bruce tries to ask.

“I’m Darcy. You’re Bruce Banner, aka the Hulk. And you totally saved Tony ‘Dumb Ass’ Stark’s hide in that shit show. I’m showing my appreciation with hugs. If you can do the Hulk thing now, I’ll give him hugs too.”

“That’s probably not the best-“

“Did she tell you she’s my kid? That would probably explain some things,” Tony says as he wanders up, wiping his hands on a rag. Or towel. Or random piece of fabric Dummy handed him.

Bruce looks down at the woman cuddling herself against him. “So… no self-preservation then?”

“Nope.” They both pop the P. He sighs, and wraps his arms around the Stark that’s glued to his torso. Another minute goes by, and he gives in to the sad eyes. He extends his left arm away from the girl, and immediately has Tony hugging him as well.

“Is this what I should get used to working with?”

“You need hugs, Bruce. You’re going to get them with the Stark clan. Just be glad that Jarvis doesn’t have a body yet. I bet he gives the best Stark hugs.”  


“I doubt that, Darcy. You do seem to cling like a monkey whenever you can,” Jarvis says.

“Yeah, and you’re a learning AI. And you’re learning from the best.”

Another minute goes by. “So… Are you planning on letting go any time soon?” Bruce asks.

“I wasn’t. You?”

“Nope. You have a cuddle deficit, Banner. Until Jane yells for me, or one of Dad’s things blows up-“

“Why is it always my things that blow up?”

“Um, cause mine don’t?”

“Right, because I DIDN’T have to send Dummy to Fosters lab yesterday to put out a fire.”

“That wasn’t me, that was-

‘Oh, don’t even-“

“Uh, guys? If you’re going to start fighting, you probably want to let go of me first.”

Two sets of eyes swivel over to him, and each face cocks an eyebrow. They then look at each other, screw their mouths up, and sigh.

“Bruce, dude. Learn from Pepper side of the Force. It’s better to let us fight it out until we’re both so pissed off that we can’t do anything but glare.”

“She’s right. Once we get to that side of disgruntled, all it takes is reminding us that we really love each other, and we have to hug it out.”

Banner looks from one to the other. Finally, he shrugs. “Or I could let the Hulk deal with you.”

He immediately starts trying to remove them once he sees the gleeful look on both faces. “No, NO, that is not a good idea.”

“We have that space up state-“

“Can totally wreck it, and no one would care!”

“I was thinking about making it into Avengers stuff anyway-“

“Yeah! And we can Science there!”

They both look so ecstatic that Bruce can’t form an argument. Then Darcy’s face falls. And she pulls away.

“But not today. Or tomorrow. It’ll have to be after. I… I have to be there tomorrow.”

She looks so sad that Bruce feels he has to coax her back into the group hug. “What’s tomorrow?”

He feels her sigh into his shirt collar. “I gotta go to a funeral.”


	10. Steve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve Rogers doesn't trust without reason.

Steve Rogers has lost people before. He lost his mother, long before he went into the army. He had Bucky then, even when he wanted to believe he could handle everything himself. He lost soldiers under his command in the war. And then he lost Bucky, the last person that could keep him going until the end of the line.

Then he put that damned plane in the water. And he thought that was it. He was done. He did what he had to, and it was over. Until it wasn’t.  
He woke up, and there’s still a fight to be won. And people to be lost. After the Avengers win, after the fight is over, there is still a ruin in Manhattan. 

There is rebuilding to be done.

There are still funerals to attend. Slights to fix. He stands next to Hill at Coulson’s grave as the priest speaks, the signed Captain America card burning in his breast pocket. One by one, mourners move towards their cars, and he waits to be alone again.

The woman standing under the birch tree is starting to annoy him. She was there when he got to the graveyard, and she hasn’t moved since. After another ten minutes, he gives in, and starts towards the road. Once he has cover from another tree, he stops and watches.

She dabs her eyes under her black veil, and starts towards Agent Coulson’s grave. Once there, she surprises him by kneeling down, and then sitting on the ground next to the fresh earth. He doesn’t mean to eavesdrop; his hearing was enhanced with everything else.

“Hey, Agent Agent. I… I don’t even know what to say here. I’ve had to say goodbye to too many people, too many times. And most of the time, they came back. You know? It was a goodbye, an ‘I love you’, that didn’t need to be said, because it turned out okay.

“But this? You weren’t supposed to do this. You were the one I thought I’d never have to say things to. That is SO not fair of you. And if you were here, I’d be punching you in the shoulder SO HARD right now.”

She tears the veil off her hair, smacking it and her fist into the ground as more tears fall. “It’s not fucking FAIR, Phil. You were supposed to be safe. I watch Jane, you watch the Avengers. I kept my end of the deal. And I guess you kept yours. The team made it, they saved the day. But you had to go in alone.”

Steve watches as she wipes her face with her clean hand. “You couldn’t wait for back up, could you? You had to face down a fucking GOD on your own. Dumb ass.”

She digs in her bag for a minute, before bringing out a plastic bag of white powder. “You deserve this, jerk.”

Steve doesn’t even realize he’s moving until he has her wrist in his hand, and her shocked face looking up at him.

“What’s in the bag, ma’am?”

“What the fuck, asshole? Let go!” She yells as she tries to yank her arm away.

“This is the grave site of a decorated officer. What are you-“

“It’s fucking FLOUR. Now let GO of me!” 

They glare at each other for a minute.

“Why would you bring a bag of flour to a funeral?”

“Why would you hang around a grave being a god damned creeper? Jesus, look, “the woman says, opening the bag. She licks her finger, sticks it in the bag, and then shoves her finger in her mouth. “Ugh, I wish I had something to wash that taste out. Wanna try?”

To her surprise, he does the same thing, including the same wince she had at the flavor.

“So… Flour.”

“So… Creeper.”

He seems to realize the height difference, standing over her, and plants himself down on the grass next to her. He’s still way taller, though.

“Steve Rogers.”

“Yeah, figured that. Darcy Lewis. Have you NOT seen the thing he did? With the flour? I was there, it’s totes legit.”

“I’m… not sure what most of that meant.”

“Aww, kid. No one did the internet talk, did they?”

“Miss Lewis-“

“Nah, it’s just Darcy. And I’m about to introduce you to YouTube. I gotta do the thing first, though.”

“The thing?”

“I’ll explain about the thing later. Come on, hop up, and let’s show Phil off proper.”

They both stand up, and Steve crosses around to stand on the opposite side of the grave. 

“You owned those thieves, Phil. I’m gonna make Nat teach me that kick you used. I’m still super pissed that you let Loki stab you, but you deserve a proper send off. Even if it’s probably going to get on my dress.”

She scatters the bag over the grave, and Steve doesn’t say anything as it sweeps back on both of them in a dusting in the wind.

“You have a thing you want to do?” Darcy asks.

“Yeah, I…” Steve says, as he pulls the card out of his pocket. “I’m sorry I didn’t have time to sign this for you. You were a good man, and a good soldier for SHIELD. I wish I’d had a chance to…”

He trails off, noticing the look on Darcy’s face. “What’s wrong?”

“Where did you get that?”

“It was in Coulson’s pocket. When he was-“

She smacks her hand on the side of her head, not looking away from the card. “Jay, do a PR-7 scan, NOW.”

A pale blue light crosses over the graveyard. Darcy tilts her head to the side briefly, and then her eyes focus on him.

“Captain. I think this is where we go on separate paths.”

“What-“

“Apparently, I’m going to have to go cleaning. There are mice in the basement.”

“That doesn’t make any-“

She grabs him by the arm, trying to tug him away from the grave. “You don’t want to be a part of this business, Steve. Go now, while you can.”

“I’m not leaving until you explain what’s going on,” he says, digging his heels in. Not that she could really move him.

“I CAN’T. Steve, go!”

“Not gonna happen!”

“Fuck. Red Rover, Red Rover, send Nick the fuck over!”

“About time, Lewis. Thought I wasn’t even gonna have a chance to pay my respects.”

Fury saunters up to Coulson’s grave. He promptly gets a kick to the back of the knee and an elbow in his good eye.

“Why did I think letting Agent Romanoff train you was a good idea?” He asks, standing gingerly on his good leg.

“Because you thought I’d fight for you. You thought I’d fall in line with your good little soldiers. But THIS?” she says as she yanks the card out of Steve’s hand, shoving it into Fury’s face. “This was too far.”

“Um, Darcy?” Steve starts.

“This wasn’t in his jacket. Near mint, slight foxing. It was in his LOCKER. You stole his things-“

“They needed the push.”

“Bullshit. You needed a way to make them do what you wanted. Just like… this. How could you?”

“Lewis, don’t you-“

“Dare? I wouldn’t dream of… oops.”

There’s a whine of repulsors, and both men look up for Iron Man. Until Darcy launches a blast out of her hand to Coulson’s grave. It explodes outwards, covering them all in dirt and wood splinters.

“Oh, he isn’t there, is he? Because he’s not fucking dead! You. You let us all grieve, and he’s not even-“

“How did you do that? You don’t even have-“

“Oh, fuck off, Nick. That is not anything to do with you. I am OUT. I am SO out.”

She storms off towards the road. Steve gazes down into the empty ground, before rounding on Fury. 

“Is that true? You were using Agent Coulson to try to get us in line?”

“Rogers-“Fury starts, wincing as he puts pressure on his knee.

“With all due respect, Sir, she’s right. Fuck off, Nick.”

It takes all of ten seconds to catch up to the irate woman. Uneven grass is hell when you’re wearing heels.

“Go away, Cap. I want nothing to do with SHIELD, “she mutters. 

He catches her arm as she stumbles. “Just take them off, you’ve already ruined your outfit. And I don’t feel particularly inclined to follow SHIELD at the moment, either.”

Darcy glares at him for a minute, and then very deliberately spins one finger in a circle. Steve snorts, but turns his back to her.

“I was on a USO tour with upwards of twenty dancers. You taking off tights isn’t going to make me faint.”

“Yeah, well, they didn’t have spanx.”

He hears her kick one leg out, and a muffled “Ow, fuck!” is loud in the quiet cemetery.

“Figured he was following us. NEXT ONE GOES IN YOUR GOOD EYE, NICK.” 

“Almost did anyway!”

“Note to self,” she says. “Make sure Barton wears heels more often for better training purposes.

“I’m good here, Cap. As long as my dainty ankles aren’t going to make you swoon.”

“I think I can contain myself,” he drawls, turning back to her. She’s covered in dirt, flour, and tears. And her face is a mask of stubborn.

“What are we doing here, Rogers?” she demands, arms crossed over her chest.

“Pretty sure you’re calling the shots on this one. I haven’t had an anchor since I woke up, Fury caught me unaware. If what you’re saying is true, and I got no reason to believe otherwise, I can’t trust him. What’s your idea?”

“You got a ride?”

He nods over to his motorcycle. “Not great for a woman without shoes.”

“That? Oh, my GOD, that’s fucking perfect. Especially for a woman like ME.”

She jams her finger behind her ear. “Jay, yo, call in the cavalry. No, NO, not the Cavalry, fuck, don’t call her that, she hates that. I’m coming in hot, cover me. I’m going to do a thing.”

Rolling her eyes, she waits until Steve is on the bike before following. “No, don’t ask… Have you not learned by now? You don’t ask about the thing, just roll with it. So, call it in.

“Call in the Avengers. We have mice in the basement, and we are going to have to fix it.”

“Taxi,” she half whispers, in case of loitering Directors. “Stark Tower, please. Jarvis’ll give you the route to the back door. Also? As fast as you can. Literally, we’re getting clearance from all sectors.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Steve replies as he takes off. He expects her to tell him to slow down as he takes a curve at an alarming pace. She rolls into the turn with him, and hollers a laugh. 

“Fuck yeah, Rogers. Own it!”

Twenty minutes later, they screech to a stop in a garage filled with the Avengers, Pepper, Rhodey, and Happy.

“That was fan-fucking-tastic, dude? We get followed?”

“That is a negative, Darcy. I am also delighted to report that Director Fury is still making his way towards his car.”\

“You took out Fury with a kick to the knee?” Natasha asks.

“Yeah. He needs a refresh. That aside, we need to go above level 78. NOW. There’s a thing.”

Steve is surprised to see Tony of all people finagle his way next to Darcy, and throw an arm around her. “There always is with you.”

“I didn’t blow anything up!”

The snort Steve gives out isn’t his fault. Not really. Only a little. Tony raises his eyebrows.

“It was… it’s why we’re going above 78. Don’t ask yet,” she says, burrowing into his chest.

Steve is a good soldier. He’s a good man. But back before anyone besides his mom and Bucky saw something in him, he got real good at watching people. He’s still watching now. 

Tony would kill for this girl. He’s sure of it. Bruce too. Whatever she’s told them, whatever she is inside, they are devoted to her. Nat’s harder to figure out, but there’s worry in her eyes. Barton…

Barton was the one he was the most concerned about after New York. He didn’t have field time with him that Nat did, he wasn’t sure how badly Loki screwed with his head. He watches as Darcy loosens one hand, and starts slapping at Barton.

“You’re losing.”

“Am not,” he says, smacking her hand.

“Are fucking too. Douche. And I have tales to tell, so we all need to go upstairs.”

“Good tales, or bad tales, D-girl?”

“Depends on how good the booze Dad’s providing is.”

Clint yanks her out of Starks arms and into his. “You… are covered in dirt. The FUCK, Darce?”

“Long story.”

“Long enough that you can’t take a shower?”

“Good question, Jay, stop the elevator,” Stark demands. “Kid, what the fuck?”

“I was going to go with explanation first-“

“You’re covered in… Jesus, how did I not see-“

“It’s fine. Okay, it’s not really fine, but”

“We’ll order take out, go get cleaned up, you too, Cap, did you two get in a dirt fight?”

“Dad-“

“No really, I feel like I should send you to your room or something. What-“

“I need to be above the 78’th floor,” Darcy states. “Right now, I don’t care what the fuck happens after that. But I need to have clearance.”

“She’s right. I hate that she’s right, but that is what needs to happen right now,” Steve says, as he closes an arm around her. 

He glares at Barton for a minute, and they both back off as Jarvis announces Darcy’s floor. She steps out. “Go clean up, and order a shit ton of food. Literally. I might only eat a plate or two, but the rest of you consume a deli on a regular basis. And this isn’t going to be a great conversation.”


	11. Darcy Makes a Phone Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy's going to have to face up to the Avengers. Just not yet.

Darcy Lewis stumbles into her already running shower, thanks to her awesome brother. She has to wash her hair three times to get all of the graveyard grit out of it, but finally, she has to acknowledge that she can’t get any cleaner. She steps out and towels off, wrapping her hair up in a turban and shrugging her robe on.

“Jay,” she asks, stepping into her bedroom. “Any chance I can get out of this conversation?”

“Of course, Darcy,” he replies. “But you need to have it anyway.”

“Yeah, I thought so. Am I gonna hold up anyone from eating?”

“I will not send for food until your phone call is over.”

“You know, your brand of awesome puts me on the spot sometimes.”

“Your father may have mentioned that a time or two.”

“Great. Okay.”

She picks up her phone and dials out to a familiar contact.

“What’s wrong, dearest?”

“Why does something have to be wrong for me to want to talk to you?” 

“You call on Saturday. It’s Tuesday. Something must have flustered you. What was it?”

Darcy sighs. “I may have… started a war with an alphabet soup agency.”

The other side of the line is silent.

“And I MIGHT… have beaten up the Director of SHIELD.”

“…And?”

“And I blew up a grave all over Captain America and then he brought me home on his bike and I found out bad things about SHIELD. And I have to go TELL the Avengers about it, and it’ll be a thing!” she rushes out.

“Well, that does sound a bit of a mess. Did the grave still have parts in it?”

“THAT’S what you’re asking from that babble?”

“Well, it did seem the most important. You are a Stark, if you have a problem with authority, you are going to neutralize it. If you need to get a team together, of course you will get the best one out there. From the way Tony and Steve speak of you, the Avengers already adore you. So yes, I’m most concerned about you having bits of corpse on you.”

“… I took a shower.”

“Fantastic, that’s much more than your father would have done. Now, go explain to the rest of them what needs to be sorted.”  
“You always were refreshingly blunt.”

“I’ve been dealing with you lot for seventy years. I’m accustomed.”

Darcy is silent for a minute. “It was Agent Coulson. The grave. The EMPTY grave, I might add. That’s the one I blew up.”

She hears a startled breath sucked in. “He’s still alive, then? And Director Fury was lying about it?”

“Yeah. I have to go explain to the Avengers. There are mice in the basement, Auntie Peggy.”

“I’m so sorry, my darling. I’m sorry I didn’t see it. But you and your father are strong. You have Steve, and those charming Agents on your side. You will win this.” 

“I don’t think so. Not like this. This is… This is SHIELD battling itself, this is Legacy stuff. I think I need something else.”

“Darcy Stark, you listen to me. You will do what you have to, and you will do it better than anyone else. I have known you your entire life, and I believe that about you. You have the Avengers. They are tools for you, and for each other. If you decide to take on your own team?” Director Carter has a smirk in her voice. “You lead them, you demand their loyalty, you decide who is on the roster.

“If there are mice in the basement, that is my fault. Mine and Howards. We should have done better for you, but we can’t anymore. And I wish I wasn’t leaving this in your hands, but better yours than anyone else’s.”

Darcy pulls her feet up under her. “You really think I can do this?”

“Who else could, sweetheart?”

“I have to do this.”

“I’m sorry. But yes.”

“Okay. Okay, Pegs. This is going to SUCK. But doing the difficult thing is what we do in this family, right?”

“Absolutely, Darcy. Call me when it’s done, yes? And call me Saturday, give me an update?”

“Of course, love you, Aunt Peggy!”

“Love you, sweetling!”

Dashing a few more tears away, Darcy finishes drying her hair, and gets dressed. The coming hours won’t be great. She’s not looking forward to them. 

She’s got to do a thing. Again. At least she didn’t have to explain to her Aunt that it was Thursday.

At least her Aunt won’t remember what she’s about to have to say.


	12. Happy, Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is part one of Happy's chapter. I keep getting caught up revising it that I start sniffling each time. The second part will start with the end of Chapter 10.

Happy Hogan didn’t start out with a lot of respect for Tony Stark. He’s the kind of moneyed jerk that gets into fights he can’t win, makes bets that won’t work out, and picks up women that won’t stay more than a night unless they’re paid in goods for it. He sees a pattern early on, though.

Tony doesn’t get in to fights. He buys his way out of uncomfortable situations if he has to, but he doesn’t start anything. Other guys do, they want to beat up on the rich guy, who is pretty much just a center of anger and caffeine and a need to prove himself.

He also doesn’t make bets that win. Happy notices it early, and spends the next few months counting up how much money Tony is losing, just so he can go to a quiet bar and hang around locals that don’t recognize him. 

It’s two years in that he thinks he’ll have to actually call a stop to the entire thing when a ten year old girl hoists herself up in the booth next to Stark. 

“I’m Darcy. You’re Happy. Really, is that what you like going by?”

He nods.

“Kay. Think they have cheese fries here?”

“It’s a fucking bar, kid. They should have… I mean-“

He turns a panicked look to Tony, who shrugs.

“Barkeep! Your finest in fried foods! And dressings. And…. You got anything healthy?” he hollers. Then he turns to the kid.

“So… Wanna explain? Cause, you aren’t supposed to be here on a weekday, which is why I’m HERE, and not at the house, and the fact that you are is…?” 

“They don’t get it. I’m eleven, and they’re planning my life out for me. Like, I don’t even WANT to be a lawyer, but-“

Tony gapes at her. “They want you to go to LAW SCHOOL? I thought you wanted to be a vet?”

“I DO, they don’t listen. You’re not always sober, but at least you listen,” the girl sighs.

“Did you tell them where you were going, kidlet? Or did you just take off?” He gets a sad look from her.

“Seriously? You think they’d just LET me travel half of the country on my own. I’m ELEVEN.”

“Your grandfather sent me to boarding school at eight, so I’m not the best judge here.”

A plate of cheese fries, one of onion rings, and one of wings is delivered to their table.

“Amazing work, fantastic, and if you could keep whatever you’re hearing off the record, that’d be awesome. And well compensated.” 

The server moves back towards the bar, and Stark sags. “Shit. Oh fuck, you didn’t hear that from me, okay?”

Darcy shrugs around a mouth full of onion ring. “Denny Chambers said both those words, and three other ones the teacher told us not to talk about last week. He got suspended. And I kicked him.' 

“You kicked him,” Tony frowns. “Why did you kick him, Darcy?”

“He was trying to be mean to Matt, just cause he’s as small as me. They said… they were planning on being meaner, okay? Just cause he can’t do sports doesn’t mean they gotta pick on him.”

“Ah, hell, kid,” Tony says, wrapping her into a hug. “You can’t fight all their battles for them. But I’m proud of you, okay. You did the right thing, sticking up for your friend.”

“Yeah, tell Mom that. She was pissed off at me before I ran. She is going to be SO mad I got here.”

“Hap,” Tony starts-

“I’ll get the car ready, boss.”

“No, that’s not what… This is my daughter, Darcy. I’m sure you got that. Can you sit with her, while I talk to her mom? And, if needed, vouch that she’ll be safe with us. I wasn’t expecting her to rabbit-“he says, scooting away from the girl, out of the booth.

“I have this, boss, make the call. The kid and I have plenty to eat, and I’m sure the bar has juice or something. Go, no, not the front, either head to the kitchen or the bathroom. I’d prefer the kitchen.”

Stark wanders off away towards the front of the bar, and Happy shakes his head and sighs.

Happy and Darcy sit across from each other, slowly eating. He signals the waitress for… he doesn’t know. He gestures towards the kid and makes a drinking motion. She nods, and heads behind the bar.

“So. Law school? How’s that working out?” Happy asks.

“It’s stupid. Mom and Dad want me to be a freaking lawyer cause I’m smart, but I wanna do science. But not every other weekend Dad science, you know?” she says, eyeing up a chicken wing with distrust.

“Hel- er, heck kid. What kind of science do you want to do?”

Her interest in the food is gone. “I wanna make things better. I want to help. Mom and Dad think that I need to do this one thing. Dad wants me to do something else. He’s…”

She pauses, and her shoulders drop. “I’ve known I was Tony Stark’s kid since I was little. Mom and Dad… they love me, I know they do. But Mom’s a little scared of me.”

She looks towards where Tony left. “He doesn’t know what to do with me either. He’s doing his best, but they didn’t expect me, and I’m not what either of them thought. I… I’m eleven. I don’t know what to with any of it except hurt the person that is trying to hurt my friend. I am not afraid to bite.”

“And you keep doing that. Someone tries to hurt you, you do what you need to get out of it. You spend much time with your dad?”

“I call him ‘every other weekend Dad’ for a reason.”

Happy nods. “Then I’ll teach you how to punch.”

“Really?”

“Really, kid.”

“Okay. Do you need to go rein Tony in?” She asks, balancing both knees on the booth to reach the fries.

“Probably. How pissed is your mom going to be?”

“Well… It was two thousand miles, so…?

“Darcy?”

“Happy?”

“All of your parents, plus me, are going to be angry at you in a minute.”

She slumps down. “I already knew I was gonna be grounded. Will you still teach me how to hit?”

“Kid?” he says, looking at her dejected face, “I’ll show you everything I got. How do you feel about kneeing a guy in the nu- um. No no zone? You’ve already-“

“Punched Derek when he looked down Marcy’s shirt? Yeah, I did that. Boys are stupid, “she snarks, looking down. “I didn’t get in trouble that time. Just grounded.”

Seeing the look on her face, he decides he needs to collar his boss. 

“Want me to get him?” Darcy asks.

“I can-“

“It’ll just piss Mom off more.”

Happy watches as Darcy hops off the cushion, wanders over to the window, and taps on it with her tiny fist.

Her dad looks down, and gives her the most honest smile Happy has ever seen through the glass. He watches as Darcy goes outside, takes the phone, and curls into her father’s side. She turns further in as she speaks, and Tony crouches down around her. He finally takes the phone away, and pulls her up onto his hip as he stands. The two cuddle together as Tony sways back and forth slightly.

Happy didn’t start out respecting Tony Stark. He’s angry at him more often than not. But scenes like this? Watching him comfort his daughter? Watching them spar together, using the moves he’s taught them? And later, watching Stark actually tear up when Darcy tells him she’s got enough credit to finish her first degree in engineering before starting the last year of her second degree in poli-sci? 

The man might be an ass, but he loves his kid, and there’s plenty to respect in that. And Happy will never let on that he was the one to talk Darcy into a degree in her ‘every other weekend dad’s’ field.


	13. Happy, Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy is not cut out for this. But there's free food

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My muse hasn't been happy since early November. We're trying to work things out. I'm also trying to figure out who gets the next chapter, so feel free to advise!

It’s tiny Darcy that Happy is remembering as he greets her with the rest of the Avengers in the garage. She’s covered in dirt and something white, and he sees a girl looking for solace. Her dad peels away from the group to greet her, much to Rogers’ surprise, and he and Barton jostle for space with her later.  
Happy is the one that stops the rest of the team from following her off the elevator. 

Most of them step back easily, but Stark, and surprisingly Romanoff, glare at him as the doors close. They make their way to the common area, and Happy stations himself next to the elevator doors. Something is very wrong, and no one is getting in or out of the elevator without his approval.

Miss Potts arrives, followed shortly by Doctor Foster. She’s a unexpected addition, though he’s not sure if she’s there as Thor’s representative or Darcy’s best friend. He watches them all mill around, little conversation to be had until either Darcy or the food arrive.

At one point, he sees Barton and Romanoff having a silent conversation. He’s pretty sure they’re trying to decide if one or the other should repel off the side of the building to Darcy’s rooms.

The elevator chimes, and Dummy wheels out a cart laden with take-out bags. After a cursory check, he allows the bot to take the food towards the large table and distribute the bags. He only spills one. That counts as a win in everyone’s book.

Another chime, and a tired, but clean, Darcy walks out. She and Stark look at each other for a moment, and then she nods once, stiffly. 

Knowing the boss has this under control, Happy starts towards the lift to leave. A hand on his arm stops him.

“Hap? I know you don’t like knowing too many details about the work here, but this is a big security thing. You should be involved. Please stay?”

He looks down at her sad face. “I’m sure there’s cheese fries.”

“But not chicken wings, right?” she asks, scrunching her nose.

“Rogers insisted, kidlet,” Tony says. “But he can eat them all, you don’t even have to look. Just blink once, and they’ll be gone.”

“I’m sorry, Miss Lewis-“

“Ugh, we went OVER this!”

Captain Rogers crooks half a smile. “Sorry. I didn’t know you didn’t like them, DARCY, or-“

“It’s cool, dude, as long as I don’t have to eat them. I got into a fight when I was in middle school about how buffalos don’t have wings, and haven’t really trusted chicken wings ever since. But you do you, boo. You do you.”

They all slowly take plates, eating in an awkward silence. A few attempts are made at questioning Darcy, but she stops each one, shaking her head. 

“Believe me, you want to eat first. You probably won’t want to after. Except for Clint. He’ll eat anything, any time.”

Barton looks affronted, before sagely nodding. “This is not untrue.”

Finally, the plates are pushed aside, and they’re all trying to not look at the woman at the same time. She sighs.

“There are mice in the basement.”

“You’ve said that several times, Darcy. What does that mean?” Rogers asks, leaning forward.

“SHIELD has been compromised,” she states, eyes on the floor.

Everyone has something to say, or ask about that. All at once, apparently. Happy watches her shoulders hunch in closer, her stance on the couch becoming more and more defensive. It’s Banner, of all people, that raises his voice over the others.

“The Hulk likes mice. He thinks they’re cute. For some reason, they aren’t scared of him. He ended up in a field, once, and all the field mice wanted to climb on him.”

There isn’t a single person NOT looking at him with a gaped jaw. Romanoff’s is metaphorical, of course.

“So, I’m not thinking that you mean Gerald.”

Darcy coughs a bit, and recovers. “Who’s Gerald?”

“He had stripes. He was the Big Guys favorite. What mice are we talking about, Darce?”

She looks at him, and only him. “Fury lied to us.”

“Well, we knew that. He’s THE spy, kid, he-“

“Agent Coulson isn’t dead.”

“Bullshit,” Barton stated plainly. “We were just at his funeral. His god damned-“

“Closed casket funeral. ‘Meeting his wishes.’ One answer, before I get yelled at anymore. And not from Steve or Tony. Where were Phil Coulson’s Captain America cards?”

“In his locker,” Barton, Romanoff, and Miss Potts answer together.

“Then what’s this?” Darcy asks, throwing the card she’d yanked out of Steve’s hand onto the table.

Everyone stares at the card, Foster and Banner with some confusion. 

“Fury said they were in his coat,” Tony states.

“Why is there blood on them?” Pepper asks.

Darcy sighs. “Fury used them to push the team into action. He used Phil to make you step into line. He was lying.”

“Why is he Ph-“ Tony starts.

“But you can’t know,” Barton snarls, pushing up from the couch. “Just because Fury used them to get the team together, that doesn’t mean Coulson is still alive.”

“I don’t know if it’s true,” Rogers says quietly. Darcy turns hurt eyes on him. “But he sure as hell wasn’t in the grave we mourned at earlier. All Fury would confirm is that he used the cards and the funeral to get us into line. That makes me less than favorable towards believing anything he says at the moment.”

“How do you know?” Romanoff asks quietly. “How do you know Coulson wasn’t buried?”

There is a whine of repulsors, and everyone looks at Stark. He holds his hands up in a surrendering fashion. There is then the snap of electricity, and everyone looks at Darcy.

One hand has a faint glow, and the other is sparking between her fingers. “We made them subcutaneous. I always have a weapon on me. Literally.”

“She blew up the grave,” Rogers answers. “And there was nothing in it. I can’t say if Coulson is alive or dead, but whatever he is, he wasn’t buried today. That’s why we were covered in dirt.”

There’s another long silence before Happy speaks.

“Boss?”

“Yes, Happy?” Two sets of voices ask, before Stark turns to Miss Potts and bows, angling both arms towards Hogan.

“I think I should start setting up some new security parameters. Am I good to go, here?”

Stark, Darcy, and Miss Potts convene for a minute, before Miss Potts nods. 

“Yes, Happy, thank you. We will let you know of any further information necessary for the safety of Stark Industries.”

As he turns to leave, he feels a fist knock on his back. He looks down, and there is tiny Stark looking back at him.

“Thank you for staying Happy. This sucks.”

He ducks down to hug her. The distance is not as much as he remembers it being once, but she’s still his tiny charge to look after.

“You take care, kid. You got me, and them, looking after you.”

“Oh Happy, it’s going to get so much worse,” she whispers, tucking her head into his neck. “I’m going to start a fight.”


	14. JARVIS does not approve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JARVIS loves his sister. He does not always approve of her life decisions.

JARVIS was designed as a learning program. He likes to think that he developed the best parts of his programming not only from Sir, but from those around him. It wasn’t until he was linked in to Darcy permanently that he started forming opinions. And strategies. And independent queries. His overall view of the Tower meant he could watch what was going on in the common area, while casting a wider net over what was going on around the world.

As soon as Mr Hogan leaves, the Avengers turn on each other. Barton and Romanoff seem desperate to defend Director Fury, while Sir and Dr Banner are convinced that what Darcy has told them is true. Darcy herself hasn’t moved from her defeated stance near the elevator.

“Jay, what have you got for me?” she asks, turning and leaning against the wall.

“Not certain as of yet, Darcy. I need more specific parameters.”

“We can’t trust SHIELD. And the Avengers aren’t acting like a team right now. I need… I need,” she trails off. 

Huffing out a breath, she states, “I need coffee. And I need to check on Jane’s equipment. So, trip to the lab, and then a coffee shop, stat.”

“Of course,” Jarvis responds. The elevator opens at the same time Tony and Steve get into each other’s faces.

Darcy ghosts the lab, completely on auto pilot. One by one, she checks the machines. One by one, she types Jane’s scribbles into something sensible. Her mind is completely not checked in, though. Her mind is on one thing and one thing only. What is SHIELD hiding?

It takes almost an hour, but as she is dithering over the last piece of equipment, JARVIS chimes in on her com.

“Darcy?”

“Oh, thank God. Please tell me you have something for me.”

“… I do, but you are not going to be pleased at the information.”

“Jay… I knew that going in. What did you find?”

Her brows draw closer together as she listens. “And you’re sure? It’s… but I thought… you’re SURE?”

Jarvis pauses. “I’m afraid I am. SHEILD has been compromised. Severely. How do you wish to proceed?”

Darcy sighs. “They need to know. Are they done yelling yet?”

“I’m afraid not. They seem unlikely to do so any time soon.”

“Great. Well,” she sighs. “Back into the war.”

“…Darcy?”

“Yeah, Jay?”

“I suggest not letting them know everything we’ve uncovered. As they are at odds, their brand of retaliation might not be what is needed.”

“Have you and Auntie Peggy been talking?”

“We never stopped. She has a suggestion for you.”

Darcy rallies herself, and takes the elevator back up.

“Hey, guys?”

The Avengers don’t even pause.

“So, really, GUYS!”

There is not even a blip in the yelling.

“So, I’m going to go do a thing, and you aren’t invited. Kay?”

More yelling. Cause that’s always going to be a good sign.

 

Darcy Lewis is not in a good mood. It’s not even sunset when she storms out of the tower.

“Won’t even listen… like I DON’T KNOW what I’m doing… This is WHY-,” she pauses, head tilted. “Jay. Jaaaa….y.”

There is a sigh. “You are going to do a thing?”

“Yup. You in, or out?”

“How dangerous is the thing?”

“DUDE.”

“I know. Do not ask about the thing. But Darcy… we’re all worried,” JARVIS says.

“I get it, super dude. But I can’t not do this. Whatever is in that base needs to be taken out. By whatever means necessary. I got the intel, and I have to go. The Avengers won’t actually LISTEN to me, and Steve is all ‘Blah blah blah, judicial system’, and I don’t trust them to do this right. So, I have to go my own way. Aunt Peggy agrees.”

“Darcy-"  
“Nope, sorry man. I may not be the star spangled man with a plan, but I have an idea. It’s probably a bad idea, but it’s all I got.”

“Dar-“

“No, Jay,” she says, stopping on the sidewalk. “If you aren’t helping me out here-“

“Little sister. I have more information on the base, and why it is a target.”

Darcy backs into an ally, head cocked to the right. As JARVIS tells her what he’s found out, she gets more and more tense. 

“Just secure my location. I’ve got this.”

She wanders into a fairly dismal bar.

“Yo, dude, can I get a shot of tequila?”

A bar stool gets thrown at her. She repulsors it out of the air.

“Okay, Mother Fuckers, I got things to do today. I have NO TIME for you having dick measuring contests. So, stow it, and I’ll pay for your drinks the rest of the night, we got a deal?”

Everyone settles down with their drinks. “I need someone not scared of certain death. And…”

“Oh, me, me, me, me. Right over here!”

Darcy looks around, ignoring the obvious waving hands. “Anyone? Anyone else want to volunteer for a death wish that can skip along merrily by my side?”

“I can skip, I prefer it, and I can also salsa. What do you need, pretty lady?”

“Can I get my shot?” she hollers down the bar.

It’s set in front of her, along with one for Skippy guy. He lifts the bottom of his mask up enough to drink it, and drops it again. “What’s the catch?”

“I wanna put a team together.”

He makes a frowny face. Mouth. It’s a pretty expressive mouth/face mask. “I don’t do teams very well. Ask the X-men.”

She shoots her tequila, and turns towards him on her bar stool. “Oh, kitten. This isn’t going to be your usual team.”

“Oh yeah,” he snarks. “What’s so different?”

“I got a bunch of bad guys that need taking out. And I need maximum effort.”

Blank white eyes look at her. “I get to kill bad folk?”

“You do indeed. They’re hurting good people, and I will not stand for that. They think they can make people… better.”

Deadpool looks at Darcy for a few seconds. “Did you just quote Firefly at me?”

Darcy takes the shot Weasel set in front of her. “I did. I’d ask if you were in, but you volunteered.”

“Yes. Yes, I did. Also, how bad are we talking? Are the fans going to agree, because-“

“Dude, EVERYONE is going to like what we are doing. But I need to know how committed you are before I recruit the rest. If we can do this, I have to go break someone out of prison.”

“I like where your head is at. I can-“

“No, man. I got a roster. Here, Jarvis has it for you to look at. Tell me if you approve, disapprove, or you a “have a kill on sight notice.”

He takes the tablet from her. “Oh HELL yes, she’s hot. He… no, just no. That one is better on the clean cut crew… Who’s THAT one?”

“No idea, but I’m on his list. Bet I can get him on our team instead of the bad guys.”

“Not that I really care, but who are we up against here?”

“Ever read about World War 2?”

“Not on purpose.”

“Ever hear about HYDRA?”

“…How many weapons can I bring?”

“As many as you can carry. But not right now.”

“Aww…”

“If this is going to be a team, we gotta have a base, and training, and, you know, more of a team. Put a list of what you need to work with together.”

“Well, first would be my girl.”

“Oh, I got that, dude. She’s covered.”

“Well then. How much can we blow up?”

“Mister Pool? Given my druthers? ALL of the things.”

“Ma’am, I’m not English, so I’m assuming that means blow all the shit up.”

“You are abso-fucking-go for that.”


	15. Vanessa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She will SO cut her.

Vanessa sighed as Wade poked at things at random around their apartment. 

“So…” he drew out.

“So,” she countered.

“I took a job.”

“Yeah, you do that… almost all the time. What’s wrong?” she asked.

“It would be an almost permanent job. Steady money, lots of work, lots of perks…”

She waited for him to add to the list, but he didn’t. “What’s the catch?”

Wade kicked around for another minute. “She wants to explain it. To you. Alone.”

“Alone?”

“Yeaaah,” he drawled. “It’s… it’s good work. It’s… work I WANT to do, to help people. But she gets that I have someone to worry about, to want to make safe. She wants to make sure you know what the risk is.”

“After everything we’ve been through, I think I know the risks.”

“But… will you do this? So I can make sure?”

Vanessa looked at him for a moment. “Okay. But I’ll cut the bitch if she’s not legit.”

Wade beamed at her. “Baby, I’d be disappointed if you didn’t.”

This is why Vanessa is dressed in her best coffee-house chic at 10 am on a Thursday. She wanders into the shop, cranky face in place, and is waved down by a woman in the corner of the store. When Wade described the leader of a team he would be a member of… this was not it.

The girl…woman?... is wearing a beanie and an aggressive cardigan. It’s... the best description is an angry bumble bee. There is a coffee steaming on the table in front of her, and another across the way. Vanessa ignores the girl and the coffee and orders her own. She then makes her way to the table.

“Are you the scary team person I’m meeting, or do you have a knitting party to wait for?” she asks.

“Can’t I do both? “Cardigan girl asks. “I’m waiting to answer some questions, but they can be ambiguous. How’s bought you go first.”

“Why me?” Vanessa asks. “Why ask to talk to me? You and Wade are going to do what you want-“

“I won’t take him in if you don’t agree.”

“I’m not his keeper.”

“Like hell,” Sweater girl says, blowing her bangs off her forehead. “Shit’s coming down on all   
of us, and I want a team that can trust each other. He’s not in if you aren’t. And I’m not putting my neck out for anyone that isn’t in.”

“What’s the-“

The shop windows explode, and the girl is in motion in an instant. Vanessa ducks under a table, and watches as Wade takes out a squad of guys, with Cardigan girl flicking debris out of the way. She kicks a counter into a team of bad guys, takes out another group with a taser out of her hand, and then lands on the floor next to Vanessa. 

“Things like this happen, mostly. It’s crappy, but I have a plan.”

“Is it a good plan?”

“Depends on your idea of a good plan.”

“Do I live in this plan?”

Bumble Bee Cardigan girl turns, shoots three more robots, and grins. “That’s kinda the whole point. Maybe we should do coffee another time.”

“Fuck that.”

Vanessa kicks a shard of window out of the way. “I can work a coffee maker.”

“Can you keep Wade away for a while? Cause we need to talk.”

Spinning parkour Deadpool keeps live fire away from the coffee house. 

“He does his own thing. And that means it might be part of what you’re after. So, what are you after?” Vanessa asks.

“Coffee. I had some, and it got exploded. So…?”

A cup of coffee is plunked down in front of her. “Explain, before I have to cut you.”

Darcy ducks her head for a moment. “I’ve got an enemy. A very specific one. They are not good people. I am willing to go to extreme measures to stop them.”

“You are asking him-“

“I’m asking him to risk everything. And all. To stop the bad people. And I’ll pay. I will pay you, and him, everything. If you help-“ Darcy cuts herself off.

Vanessa doesn’t speak, she barely breathes. Finally, she sighs. “It’s the real deal, isn’t it. He wouldn’t have had you meet me if it wasn’t.”

 

The girl looks down. She looks so god damned young. “I wouldn’t have asked if I had a choice. It’s bad, man, and I…”

Glancing to the side, she continues. “I can’t do this alone. I have a plan. I do, and you guys-“her statement is cut off by the hug Vanessa has her in. 

“The HELL have you gotten us in, kid?” she asks.


	16. The Soldier

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They souldn't have brought the threat to them. Whoopsie.

“Okay JARVIS, the property is secure, start the blueprints. No, no, I’m not arguing with you about this, I want everything ready for move-in day. I don’t thi,-“ Darcy cuts off with a cry. “Jay, code three, I’ve… “

Her voice cuts off, and Jarvis is only able to take in the voices around her. 

“Subject is secure. Repeat, subject is-“

“Get away from my wife. Or I will end you.”

“Back, everyone back. Back away from the Soldier. We were just checking on her wellbeing, sir. She has hostiles coming in after her-“ 

“I will handle them. Step away.”

“Yes sir.” Everyone backs down as the Winter Soldier picks up the newest acquirement.

The Asset takes his wife back to their room and puts her to bed. He removes non-essential weapons, and slips into bed behind her. When she wakes, being spooned from behind, she slams her elbow into his lung, kicks his knee out, and rolls off the bed to a stop.

“Who the fuck-,” she begins yelling. “Holy fucking shit. You’re Bucky Barnes.”

“I’m… I’m your husband. I’m not… Who?”

Darcy looks at him. “You… don’t know who you are? But… you… Shit.”

“Sweetheart?”

“Shit. I’m… Where are we?”

“Headquarters. They said if I cooperated they wouldn’t hurt you. But they did, you don’t remember me.”

“Because I never MET you. What the fuck did they have you sedate me with? What did they DO to you? Oh, hell. I have an inkling, Jay, inform the team.”

The two stared at each other. “Sweetheart”, he says, reaching towards her.

“Don’t fucking ‘sweetheart’ me, dude, my team will be here in a minute-“

“They said they were holding you, the Avengers, that-“

“Who said what now? Who the fuck are you at the moment, and who is keeping my… admittedly small team from saving my ass?”

“We’re,” he looks around. “Not somewhere great.”

They look at each other for a minute.

“One question here, before we have to start fighting.”

The Asset twitches, leaning towards her.

“Okay, are we fighting to stay out, or fighting to stay in? Cause I’m not planning on staying here. And I’d rather you come out with me. What’s your choice?”

“Don’t make me go back. Please.”, he says, dropping to his knees. “They hurt me. I want out.”

“Okay, so we’re blowing the hell out of this place. That puts you on team ‘Fuck Hydra’, just so you know. It’s not a big team at the moment, but we’re working on it.”

He hugs her around her stomach. “I’m also not your wife, dude, that was Hydra. But, you know, we can get dinner, or something.”

His head drops, and he nods. “I shouldn’t- “

“Hold that thought for later, man,” Darcy fusses, as she tries to cuddle his head. “We have bad guys to take out, more people to enlist, and a base to build. And a date to figure out. Let’s start one at a time.”

He looks up at her, eyes bleak. “We won’t make it to the surface.”

“Oh, baby. You haven’t met my people. How many weapons you got here?”

Letting go slightly he’s glances around. “Not enough for both of us.”

The hair on the back of his neck stands up. Darcy holds her hands out to the side for him to view. 

“I’ve got this. You wanna just wait here till I get back?”

The Soldier watches as one of her hands glows, and the other sparks. “You believe we can do this?”

She snorts. “I could do this on my own if I’m pissed enough, and believe me, I’m plenty pissed. But I don’t want them to hurt you anymore.”

“They made me think you loved me,” he says, pressing his head against her again.

“Well, if the history books are true, that could certainly be a thing. A really hot thing, we’re both pretty. But we gotta get out first, and-“

The PA cuts on, and music starts blaring over the speakers.

'X gonna give it to you, fuck waiting for you to get it on your own, X gonna DELIVER to ya.'

A massive explosion rocks the base, and Darcy sighs.

“That is the LAST time he gets to pick the music.”

Half an hour later, there are four grimy people watching a large facility burn. 

“I love it when they sparkle.”

“DP, dude, what did I say about setting off fireworks with the explosives?”

“Uh… it’s only fun if they turn into curse words? Wait for it….”

With one final bang, there is a surprisingly delicate statement written in the night sky.

‘Fuck you HYDRA, love, the team that just kicked your ass.’

“Wade?”

“Darce?”

“Did you learn calligraphy for this?”

“…Maybe?”  


“We need to move, they’ll send in reinforcements.”

At the Soldiers words, the other three look at him in glee.

“We need to regroup.”

Sighing, Darcy nods. “Yeah, I could use a shower. And I already have our next target picked out.

“How do you guys feel about Sokovia?”

Faith stops feeling around in her coat for her lighter. “Where the fuck is that?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter had me stuck for the longest time, cause I just couldn't get it exactly where I wanted it. It's still not quite there, but what's left out will be other stories in the series. BTW, YAY, my muse came back. Hope to be posting again soon! Love ya'll!


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